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How to Tell Your Children That You Are Getting Divorced

Posted on in Divorce

Wheaton divorce attorneysIf you are a parent and are considering ending your marriage, you probably have many concerns about how the divorce will affect your children. The good news is that children with divorced parents can lead just as contented a life as those whose parents are together. In fact, some studies show that children are better off with divorced parents than with parents who are miserable being married. One of the hardest parts of getting a divorce as a parent is telling the children the news. There is no perfect way to tell children that their parents will no longer be living together, but experts do have a few tips to help make the conversation less upsetting for everyone involved.

Try to Tell the Children Together With Your Spouse

While this is not always possible, many child psychology experts say that telling the children about divorce as a couple is the best way to break the news. Sitting with your spouse when you tell the children about the divorce provides a united front. The children are less likely to think that they need to choose sides or put the blame on one of the parents. If you have multiple children, it may be a good idea to tell all of them at once. When parents tell some of the children before the others, it can force them to keep a secret which they are too young to handle.

Make the Conversations Age-Appropriate

After the initial conversation breaking the news of divorce, you will probably need to answer additional questions and address concerns later on. This is the time where you can make conversations more personalized. Younger children will want to be reassured that their parents will still love and care for them, while older children may have more specific questions.

It is important for parents not to overwhelm children with too much information. Stick to the main points: You and your spouse will not be living together anymore but it is not the fault of the children. You will still continue to love the children apart just like you did when you were together. Regardless of your children’s ages, you should avoid talking negatively about your spouse or blaming your spouse for the divorce in front of them.

Contact a DuPage County, Illinois Divorce Attorney

Getting divorced when you have children can be especially challenging. For help with divorce concerns, child support, custody issues, and more, speak with an experienced Will County divorce lawyer. Contact Anderson & Associates, P.C. at 630-653-9400 to schedule a free consultation.

 

Sources:

https://www.todaysparent.com/family/kids-and-divorce-an-age-by-age-guide/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-older-dad/201105/mom-and-dad-have-something-tell-you-six-tips-talking-kids-about-divorce

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