Most people get married with the hope and belief that they are going to live happily ever after. However, people and circumstances change, which can ultimately lead to the demise of a relationship. According to statistics, approximately 40 to 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce. When a couple has children together, this can further complicate the divorce process. Many decisions need to be made regarding the welfare of the kids. These include allocation of parental responsibilities, parenting time, and child support.

The thought of parenting on your own can be overwhelming, but there are ways to embrace this next chapter. It is also critical to hire a divorce attorney who knows Illinois laws that govern divorce issues in order to protect your rights.  

Moving on After Divorce 

Single parenting can be challenging to say the least. Starting over again after being married for many years is difficult regardless of the circumstances. This new transition can result in many different emotions, such as anger, relief, excitement, anxiety, and grief. Even if your divorce is amicable, you may be so used to making decisions as partners that you do not even know how to begin living life as a single person. Try to think of this time as an opportunity to explore, rediscover yourself, and redefine your relationship with your children.  

There is no doubt the price of a college education has skyrocketed in the past decade. Tuition at public and private universities can be a huge expense for a family. When parents decide to divorce, their financial situation changes. The thought of paying hundreds of thousands of dollars for even one child’s post-high school education can be daunting. This is especially true for a spouse who was a stay-at-home parent and did not work outside the home during the marriage.

Most states allow parents who are divorcing to work out an agreement for college costs and payment details. According to Illinois divorce law, in some cases, the cost for child-related expenses such as college can be determined by a judge if a couple cannot come to an arrangement. Illinois is one of the few states where payment for college or vocational expenses can be ordered without an agreement between the parents.     

Who Can Be Ordered to Pay?

In Illinois, child support usually ends when a son or daughter turns 18 or graduates from high school, whichever comes later. It generally stops at age 19 even if the child is still in high school. The support issues that were originally addressed under the child support law then fall under the “college expenses” portion of the law. The college cost law applies to “non-minor children” or those who are over 18 years old. 

If you are a parent and are considering ending your marriage, you probably have many concerns about how the divorce will affect your children. The good news is that children with divorced parents can lead just as contented a life as those whose parents are together. In fact, some studies show that children are better off with divorced parents than with parents who are miserable being married. One of the hardest parts of getting a divorce as a parent is telling the children the news. There is no perfect way to tell children that their parents will no longer be living together, but experts do have a few tips to help make the conversation less upsetting for everyone involved.

Try to Tell the Children Together With Your Spouse

While this is not always possible, many child psychology experts say that telling the children about divorce as a couple is the best way to break the news. Sitting with your spouse when you tell the children about the divorce provides a united front. The children are less likely to think that they need to choose sides or put the blame on one of the parents. If you have multiple children, it may be a good idea to tell all of them at once. When parents tell some of the children before the others, it can force them to keep a secret which they are too young to handle.

Make the Conversations Age-Appropriate

After the initial conversation breaking the news of divorce, you will probably need to answer additional questions and address concerns later on. This is the time where you can make conversations more personalized. Younger children will want to be reassured that their parents will still love and care for them, while older children may have more specific questions.