Facebook Twitter Our Blog
Search
Anderson and Associates, P.C.

Free Initial Consultation

630-653-9400

Subscribe to this list via RSS Blog posts tagged in divorced parents

DuPage County divorce attorney

It is understandable to be concerned about your child’s well-being during your divorce process. It is an emotional and stressful time for everyone involved, especially for children. 

To them, it can seem like their whole world is being torn apart. Scientific studies have examined the effect of divorce on children, with interesting results:

...

Naperville divorce lawyer electronic parenting timeIt is important to be mindful of your children during the divorce process. Their lives are changing in many different ways, and they need to have some sort of stability during the process. After a divorce has been finalized, and the division of parenting time has been determined, it is important to have a schedule in which a child knows they are going to be able to see their parents at a designated time. 

No matter how devoted a parent is to their child, there may be circumstances beyond their control which do not allow them to be present during their scheduled parenting time. If that is the case, Illinois is a state that allows for electronic parenting time or visitation for parents. Electronic parenting time involves the parent spending time with the child using a video call, a phone call, email, or other messaging system. Modern technology makes it easier than ever for parents to be present in their child’s lives, even if they are hundreds or thousands of miles away, and parents should be sure to understand how best to use these tools to maintain a close connection with their children. 

Who Is Eligible for Electronic Parenting Time?

Not every parent or child will need to use or be eligible for electronic parenting time. This solution should not be used in cases involving abuse or habitual deviance from the schedule that was defined in the divorce decree. Electronic parenting time is typically used under extraordinary circumstances, or when it is in the child’s best interests, such as the following cases:

...

Wheaton divorce lawyer parents childrenIt is never easy to break the news of divorce, especially to children. Depending on their age, they might not really understand what getting a divorce means or why it is happening. How you bring up the decision that you and your spouse are getting a divorce can make a difference in how your children understand and react to the news. Here are five tips on how you can talk to your children about divorce and break the news to them in a healthy way:

1. Know the Right Time to Tell Them

You should make sure that you figure out the best time to tell your children that you are getting a divorce. If you and your spouse have been toying around with the idea of divorce, you should not bring your children into your conversations. You should wait until your divorce is in full swing or in its final stages before you bring it up with your children.

...

Naperville divorce attorney child custodyThough not all married couples have children, a lot of them do. When these married couples get divorced, they will have different legal issues to address than couples who do not have children. All parents can agree that children are one of the top priorities in their lives, and they will want to protect their children’s best interests during their divorce. Here are three reasons why divorce with children is not the same as divorce without children:

1. There Are More Topics to Discuss Legally

Obvious issues that need to be discussed in divorces that involve children are custody arrangements and child support payments. These issues may also affect other decisions, such as who gets the house (since a parent may wish to continue living in their home with their children), vehicles (which are used to transport children), and other property (such as children’s toys).

...

Glen Ellyn divorce lawyerDivorce is stressful for everyone in the family, especially the children. Parents are not perfect--they can, and probably will, make mistakes. However, understanding common mistakes that parents make during a divorce can increase your chances of avoiding them.

1. Making the Child the Messenger

When you are going through a divorce, you probably do not want to talk to your ex. Since the child is the common factor between both of the parents, they are often told to deliver messages to the other parent. This can be stressful for the child and often makes them feel like they are in the middle of everything. Your parenting relationship will continue with your ex for a while, and maintaining decent communication between the two of you will make things easier for everyone.

...

Naperville divorce and family law attorneyWhen a couple goes through divorce, the whole family is affected. Often, there are children involved in divorces, and because they are still developing physically and emotionally, they can be strongly affected by a divorce. While not every child is the same, and each child will react differently, there are some general tendencies that happen in children of specific age groups. Understanding how your child may react to the news of a divorce can help you comfort them through this tough time.

Infants

Even though infants are not completely aware of the situation, they do notice and react to the increased tension that a divorce can bring into a household. A stressed infant can exhibit symptoms such as:

...

Wheaton divorce attorney equal parenting timeDuring divorce, many of the most contentious disputes between spouses involve decisions made about their children, including how they will share parenting time and parental responsibility. For many years, it was presumed that living primarily with one parent was in children’s best interests. However, a number of recent studies have found that it is beneficial for both parents to be closely involved in their children’s lives. With that in mind, many states, including Illinois, have passed or are considering legislation that would presume that children should spend equal amounts of parenting time with each parent following divorce.

Illinois’ Possible Equal Parenting Law

The Illinois House of Representatives is currently considering a bill which would affect the decisions made about parental responsibility and parenting time in divorce cases. HB 4113 would make the following changes to Illinois’ divorce laws: 

...

DuPage County divorce attorney parents childrenThe breakdown of a marriage is a stressful, difficult experience, not only for the spouses, but also for their children. When parents decide to get divorced, it may ultimately be the best decision for their family, but it can also affect their children in a variety of ways. In order to protect children and provide them with the support they need, it is important to understand the impact that divorce can have on them and how these effects vary depending on children’s age.

Babies and Toddlers

Small children are still developing cognitively, and they will struggle to understand what is happening when their parents break up. However, they do recognize emotions, and they will be affected by the tension and conflict between parents. They may become irritable, they might have difficulties eating and sleeping, and their development may slow or regress.

...

Wheaton divorce attorney helping parents and children adjust to divorceThe end of a marriage can be difficult for all family members, but when parents decide to get a divorce, they may not realize the effects that it can have on their children. Even when parents do their best to prepare their children for divorce, kids can struggle with the adjustment to living in two separate homes. As parents work to end their marriage and establish new living situations, they can take the following steps to help their children transition into this new phase of their lives:

  • Follow a regular schedule - Your divorce decree and parenting plan should include a schedule for each parent’s parenting time, and it is important to follow this schedule consistently. Make sure kids know the schedule and when they can expect to spend time with each parent. It is a good idea to keep a calendar in both homes that clearly displays the days when children will spend time with each parent.
  • Maintain consistency - Kids should have regular routines that they follow at both homes, letting them know when they can expect to eat meals, work on homework or chores, and go to bed. Work together with your ex-spouse to set rules, behavioral expectations, and methods of discipline that will apply in both homes.
  • Give them their own space - You can ease your children’s transition to a new living situation by keeping familiar objects in each home, such as clothes, toys, stuffed animals, or decorations. Kids may want to keep certain items at each home, or they may bring some items with them between homes. Allowing kids to help make choices about how to furnish or decorate their room is a good way to help them become more comfortable with their new living situation.
  • Allow communication - If children miss the other parent when they are staying with you, allow them to give the other parent a call, but do not require them to do so.
  • Follow regular pick-up and drop-off routines - Cooperate in transporting children between homes and keep these transitions conflict-free. Show up on time, and, if necessary, allow kids to have a few minutes of quiet time before they leave for the other parent’s home or after they arrive.

Contact a DuPage County Divorce Attorney

While the process of divorce can be difficult, it can ultimately provide a better environment for both children and parents by eliminating the stress of living in a home that is full of conflict. The experienced, compassionate attorneys of Anderson & Associates, P.C. can work with you and your spouse to address the legal issues that must be resolved during divorce and reach an agreement that protects your and your children’s best interests. Contact a Wheaton divorce lawyer today at 630-653-9400 to schedule a free consultation.

...

Wheaton family law attorneys, divorced parents, premarital counseling, prenuptial agreement, remarriageIf your marriage has ended in divorce, you have likely gone through some difficulty as you worked to separate your life, your finances, your possessions, and your living arrangements from your ex-spouse. Life goes on, however, and before you know it, you may meet someone new and consider getting married a second time.

But before you jump into a new commitment, you should be aware that second marriages are even more likely to end in divorce. In order to avoid repeating your mistakes (or making some new ones), consider five things before getting remarried:

  1. Take your time - It can be easy to rush into a new relationship after the heartbreak of divorce. However, it is best to make sure you have fully recovered and are viewing your situation with clear eyes. Be sure you are ready to make a commitment to your new partner, and take the time to build a good foundation for your relationship and manage your expectations for your life together.

    ...

DuPage County divorce attorneys, divorce trends, divorcing couple, divorced parents, divorce rateEven though divorce is an unfortunate reality of modern life, people still get married every day, and they hope that their partnership with their spouse will stand the test of time. Whether you are planning to get married or have been married for years, you will likely want to be aware of aspects of your life that may make divorce more likely.

According to a variety of studies, the following factors may play a part in whether you are likely to get divorced:

  1. Your parents’ marriage - People whose parents got a divorce are 40 percent more likely to divorce than people whose parents remained married. Interestingly, while this may seem to be a behavioral factor caused by children observing the breakdown of their parents’ marriage, studies have looked at adoptive children and their biological parents and found that it is actually a genetic factor.
  2. Your age when you get married - People who get married in their teens or early 20s are more likely to divorce, but the likelihood of divorce also increases by 5 percent for every year for people who get married after the age of 32.
  3. Your education level - People with a college degree have a 65-78 percent chance of staying married for at least 20 years, while this rate is only 41-47 percent for people with a high school education and 49-54 percent for people who have attended college but have not obtained a bachelor’s degree.
  4. Religion - Studies have shown that people who grew up in a religious household were less likely to divorce. Married couples who practice religion and attend church regularly also have a lower divorce rate, and couples who have the same beliefs are more likely to stay together than those who do not practice the same religion.
  5. Smoking - When only one spouse smokes, a couple is 75-91 percent more likely to get divorced than when both spouses smoke.
  6. Drinking - In one study, 45-55 percent of couples in which one spouse was a heavy drinker and the other spouse was not got a divorce within 10 years. If both partners drank, or if neither partner drank, this rate dropped to 35 percent.
  7. Assets and debt - Couples who live in poverty and couples with a lot of debt are more likely to divorce, and couples who have more assets when they get married are less likely to divorce.
  8. Income - Marriages in which wives earn more than their husbands or spouses earn about the same amount are more likely to end in divorce than marriages in which the wife earns less.
  9. The cost of the wedding - One study found that couples whose wedding cost more than $20,000 were 3.5 times more likely to get divorced than couples who spent between $5,000 and $10,000 on their wedding.
  10. Cohabitation - If a couple lived together before getting married, they are about 12 percent more likely to get divorced.
  11. When kids were born - If a couple’s first child was born less than eight months after the wedding, they are 24 percent more likely to get divorced.
  12. Age difference - When there is a large difference between spouses’ ages, they are more likely to get divorced, especially if the wife is older than the husband.

Contact a Wheaton Divorce Lawyer

If you believe your marriage is in trouble, the compassionate family law attorneys at Anderson & Associates, P.C. can help you understand your rights and options and advise you of the best path to take as you either pursue a divorce or work on repairing your marriage. Contact our DuPage County divorce attorneys at 630-653-9400 to schedule a free consultation.

...
Chicago Bar Association DuPage Association of Woman Lawyers Illinois State Bar Association DuPage County Bar Association Northwest Suburban Bar Association
Address
400 S. County Farm Road, Suite 320
Wheaton, Illinois 60187
630-653-9400
Address
1515 E. Woodfield Road, Suite 640
Schaumburg, IL 60173
847-995-9999
Address
20 N. Clark Street, Suite 3300
Chicago, Illinois 60602
312-345-9999
Address
15255 West 94th Avenue, Suite 201
Orland Park, IL 60462
708-226-9904
Back to Top